This day was filled with every emotion in the book. As some of you know already I started my own Mary Kay business. I received my starter kit on February 28th, 2014. This is the year of change. I am actually super excited about stepping out of myself and becoming someone new. For thirty years I have been standoffish, reserved, quiet, and reclusive. I have felt abandoned, alone, hurt, and betrayed by so many that claimed, and were supposed, to love me it was hard to be any other way than rude, bitchy, and generally mean to anyone who tried speaking to me.
My children are getting older and they don't need me so much and I have been thinking about what I will have in this life once they are 'out of the nest' so to speak. I have a few close friends (really one or two) and a few more good friends, but nothing in my life is for me. Everything I have done since my Raven was born has been about her and then Lila when she came along. It is no secret among those I know that I utter failed with my first two children and that killed me so much I was determined to be the best mother I could when Raven came along. I made my whole life about her and making sure I did everything in my power to do what was right for my kids.
Raven is 16 this year and I find myself facing the fact that not only will she be going out on her own more but my Lila who is 9 is not someone I can smother the way Raven allowed me to. The more they grow, the less they will need me on a 24/7 basis and I am left wondering what I am making in my life for myself. What will I have when they are on their own?
I am not regretting, or sad about this growth in them but I am proud that I am raised two very independent and capable children who will not need to be sheltered, coddled, or supported when they are grown. And in furtherance of the objective not to grab my children when they wish to fly and pull them back for my own selfish, needy reasons, I have decided I need to make something for myself now.
I tried Mary Kay in the past and was not very successful, to be fair it is not only my failure but the failure of those that should have supported me as I tried to step out of my comfort zone. Just in the past six months I have had another huge betrayal by someone who is supposed to love me but instead of allowing this to make me more reclusive and standoffish, I am choosing to not let it stop me from reaching out and becoming someone new. I had another opportunity to get into Mary Kay and I decided to take it. I love the product, I love the message Mary Kay gives to women, I love the feeling of being empowered to change my life by myself.
I won't really do it ALL by myself but with an incredible team to support me as I go out into the world and use Mary Kay products to empower other women and to make a lot of friends.
So all that being said, I want to tell you about my first day going out into the world as a Mary Kay Beauty Consultant.
I knew I could not approach strangers yet and try pitching Mary Kay. Its really not how I'm built, so the HUGE bag I got with my starter kit has the Mary Kay logo on the outside. I decided to carry this bag with me on my Saturday errands and if someone approached me I would not shoot them down or avoid them, I would talk to them. It is a heavy bag, even when practically empty and I was sure my shoulder would be hurting when I got home, but I figured if even one person talked to me it would be worth it. I put a few things I might need if someone talked to me in the bag and left to go on my errands. I needed to go to the library to return a game, deposit my check at the bank, and take the bus to the mall to get my new Driver's License picture taken at the DMV. Really anyone who doesn't already know that the bag is a Mary Kay bag would have to read the logo to know and its tiny and only on one side but I still felt like I had a huge neon sign blinking and pointing at me all day.
My day started before I even left the house, I got Raven into the bathroom and we tried the Time Wise Miracle Set which starts with a cleanser, then a day solution with SPF, and a moisturizer. We both used it. I also tried out the Mineral foundation on her face. She loved it all, and was very impressed on how the foundation covered her pale face and felt light. With our faces done, we left the house. We went to the library, the bank, and then onto the bus to the mall. We stopped at the DMV and got my photo taken and my new driver's license and headed to the mall. We were all hungry so we ate at the Friendly's next to the mall. I had a Bacon Cheeseburger with fries, Raven got the Heinz 57 burger with fries, and Lila ordered sliders with goldfishes. I have never seen her LOVE a kids menu in years the way she LOVED the Friendly's kids menu. And of course, we all had ice cream too. We stuffed ourselves and ate too much, but it was all really good! The thing I found the most incredible is the waitresses bused their own tables. Our waitress even crawled under the table and picked up what had fallen under and I saw the manager even cleaning tables and delivering food. In my opinion, that is what waitresses should do. My waitress earned her 20% this day.
After lunch we went back to the mall and really just wandered around. The girls tried to win a 3D DS from one of those grabber machines that just steal your money, I saw a Harley Davidson motorcycle shop inside the mall, and Lila retrieved a ball for some kids who dropped it on the lower level. We also stopped by Claire's were we saw the piercing station and a bear sitting in a chair. Lila asked if she would get to hold the bear if she got her ears pierced and I used the opportunity to push them a bit and got them their ears pierced. I got a good deal, I paid for the starter earrings and got a second pair, under $10, for free and 50% off anything else in the store. I found a couple of cute earrings, and Lila picked a set of 9 studs. Raven found a skull headband, and Lila some tights for school. The lady was super nice, even though she was really busy and alone in the store and kept bouncing between us and the other customers. She was a bit stressed that we wanted pierced ears when she kept getting a crowd of people but she was making the best of it and I tried to show her patience and understanding as she juggled everything. I know what its like to work retail, you can be slow all day and as soon a customer needs you, that is when the crowd comes. Anyone in retail can understand that.
Once we were done, I decided it was late enough in the day to start heading home. Waiting for the bus at the mall, Lila was super excited about her earrings and was being her normal self and I was being my normal self, "Stop Lila, get down Lila, leave that alone Lila, come back here Lila". Anyone who knows us gets what I mean. She is so ADHD she is like the energizer bunny all day. A lady at the bus stop made a comment that I chuckled about. Normally, in the past, I would have looked at her as if she offended me somehow by speaking to me, but not today. Today I was determined to make a new me. So I chuckled. She got on the same bus as me and ended up sitting two seat over in the last row against the back of the bus. She pulled out a book and started to read. The girls settled in and Lila got quiet, I don't know what made me do it but I turned to the lady and said to her "The good part about her being all bounce off the walls all day is that she passes out quickly when she lays down at night". The lady looked at me and started a long conversation that lasted the whole bus ride. In the midst of the conversation I mentioned I started Mary Kay and she said she thought she had recognized my bag. She asked me for a card, but I don't have any yet, so I gave her a Look Book and added my website and phone number on the back. I heard Arlene's (shes my best friend and Senior Consultant) "get her number!" So I grabbed my agenda and asked her to write down her number so I can call her in a few days to see if she saw anything she liked. I also told her after I get my inventory in a few days I am thinking of getting a party together next weekend to show some of it off. She seemed excited for that and liked the idea. I left the bus at the Transportation center to switch buses but not before telling her (just like you would old friends) I'll see ya later and call in a few days. She was a nice lady and I learned alot about her in those twenty minutes.
On the second bus, it was packed and I stood next to Lila who was sitting and Raven sat a few seats away. A few stops later a skinny, old Asian dude got on and asked a very large black man if he could sit in the empty window seat next to him. A few stops later, the Asian dude stood up and apparently stepped on the Large man's foot. The really large man lost his head, he started yelling and screaming, threatening the guy. The big dude, grabbed the skinny guy and spun him around. I wanted to stop him but with two girls on the bus and the area of town, the likelihood the big guy was packing some kind of weapon was very possible. Besides my kids, there was a baby behind Lila, and two small kids up in the front. I felt like a jerk for not stepping in. The big guy did let the skinny guy go but talked alot of crap for a few stops. One guy who was getting off had told the big guy the skinny guy didn't speak English and the big guy almost got off the bus and hurt that guy. The big guy made alot of threats but didn't get off. Lila was crying so hard because the big guy scared her bad. Our stop was close so we got off after a few more stops. Walking home from the bus stop a police man was parked in the parking lot and we stopped to tell him about the incident. I tried the Transportation center customer service but it was closed for the night. The police man asked a bunch of questions and I told him the bus number and route number and he said he would call in a report. One thing I have to say about Ridley police is, they don't mess around.
Lila was still shaken so I called Arlene, (I had the Mary Kay stuff to share anyways) and we told her about my day. She was very proud and excited for me that I got a number and told me that she would count that as a successful day and you know what, I agree. But I was not successful cause I got a number from a potential client who would make me money, and I was not successful because I pitched Mary Kay products, I feel successful because I did something that was so far outside of my comfort zone that no one who knows me would ever say I was capable of attempting let along doing. I was scared as hell, no one will ever understand how scared I was about what I was inviting. I was so scared that my first stop of the day was to the Rite Aid to fall off my cigarette wagon. I wanted to turn around and leave the bag so many times, but I wanted a change. So I pushed through all the fear, all the doubt, all the everything I was feeling. I went so contrary to everything I am and have been for thirty years and I did it. I talked to a stranger. The best part, I made a friend.
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