OMG! They killed Grace! Oh man, I haven't been that heartbroken since Charmed killed off Prue Halliwell. Series finale of Saving Grace. Grace dies in an explosion that we hope took out that evil guy too. Just as she excepted God into her heart. With that said...
Tonight, Chicken noodle soup and chicken salad.
3 lbs chicken
2 stalks celery
whole fresh mushrooms
spinach leaves
lettuce
shredded cheese
can of cream of celery
can of cream of chicken
1 cup elbow noodles
whole red onion
Boiled chicken and shredded it. 1/3 for salad, and 2/3 for soup. Used chicken water added one celery stalk, mushrooms, and 2/3 onion and noodles. When noodles were almost done added chicken back to water and the two cans of soup. Mixed and heated through.
For the salad I put the other celery stalk and rest of mushrooms, spinach leaves, lettuce head, shredded cheese, 1/3 onion. Topped with bacon bits and dressing.
Yummy! Elbow noodles might have been the wrong noodle. Boyfriend says rice might have been better.
Went grocery shopping today for the week, spent 80 dollars and got food for all week. Spent all day on ancestry.com. Found another cousin! It was very exciting. My girls might be getting sick. We shall see how they feel tomorrow. Raven finally found the joy of listening to music. She went on and on about all the music she found. Listened to Stevie Wonder and found him amazing. LOL. Hopefully she will keep it up if she wants to be a singer she needs to.
Well, I am out again for another night. Don't forget to hit the donate button on the right. All proceeds go to buying my family and I an actual house to live in. No more crappy bug infested single wide rental trailers.
Love you all, Good Night!!
Monday, June 21, 2010
So, today is Father's Day! Happy father's day to all the fathers out there. We spent the day with Grandpa Dave and his family. Chicken wings, salad, corn on the cob, watermelon, chocolate cake and ice cream! Great day, and it ended with a thunderstorm. I love thunderstorms! Finished two math tests today. Didnt do so great on them, but at least they are finished, and that ends week two in this block of classes. We also said happy birthday to Amber today. Hence the chocolate cake and ice cream. I found a cool website today, couponclippers.com. You pay a few cents for a .50 or 1.00 off coupons and they mail them to you. Awesome stuff! Saw the new "The Next Foodnetwork Star" on the TV. I am actually watching it as I type. So who won the challenge? And who is going home?
Winner of the Challenge - Herb and Brianna.
Who is going home -Dzintra!
We ended the night with a new homeade off the cuff rice dish. Cheezy Chicken and Rice! Here is the receipe!
1 cup rice
2 cups water
1 cup chopped broccoli
1 1/2 cups chopped chicken
1/2 jar of double cheddar cheese sauce
Boil the rice as directed, I added the rest and heated through. Easy Piecey! Turned out great, another hit with the boyfriend. I got the chedder cheese from the spagetti sauce isle.
Well, this ends another day! Love all you for following my days. Don't forget to donate, just hit the donate button on the right. All proceeds go to help me buy an actual home for my family and I.
Thanks and Good Night!!
Winner of the Challenge - Herb and Brianna.
Who is going home -Dzintra!
We ended the night with a new homeade off the cuff rice dish. Cheezy Chicken and Rice! Here is the receipe!
1 cup rice
2 cups water
1 cup chopped broccoli
1 1/2 cups chopped chicken
1/2 jar of double cheddar cheese sauce
Boil the rice as directed, I added the rest and heated through. Easy Piecey! Turned out great, another hit with the boyfriend. I got the chedder cheese from the spagetti sauce isle.
Well, this ends another day! Love all you for following my days. Don't forget to donate, just hit the donate button on the right. All proceeds go to help me buy an actual home for my family and I.
Thanks and Good Night!!
Monday, June 7, 2010
Inbox Dollars
SO, I am trying this new approach to making money from home. I found Inbox Dollars, and they really do pay you for reading emails, filling out surveys, playing games, referring friends, or completeing offers. You can see my banner over on the side, clicking on that will take you straight to Inbox Dollars. I spend alot of time on this site and the more time I spend the more emails they send me. It isnt alot at first but the longer you work at it the more money comes in. But dont take my word for it, check it out. Just click, or you can make a donation by clicking on my donate button. I am raising money to buy my family our first home after 20 years in trailer parks and dead end jobs.
Friday, May 21, 2010
So, after buying a huge jar of pickles, my little one loves dill pickles, I am left with a huge jar of pickle juice. One of my friends used to drink my pickle juice but since I moved he isnt around to drink it anymore so I went online to find out what can I do with my pickle juice? I found a nice thread of different pickle juice uses. It mostly boiled down to anything you normal use pickles in you can also use pickle juice to add extra flavor. Such as potato salad, blood mary mix, or tuna salad. A lot of receipes that call for vinger you may sub pickle juice if you dont mind the pickle flavor. Julia Child's is credited with the suggestion of adding pickle juice to your water when poaching eggs. It apparently helps with keeping the white together.
Several posts on an article on seriouseats.com suggested using pickle juice in to marinate meats or using for dressings. It was even suggested as a hangover cure, most likely from the high salt content since after a night of drinking you are actually really dehydrated.
As for me, my mother used to pour pickle juice over her rose bushes.
Anyone have any other suggestions?
Several posts on an article on seriouseats.com suggested using pickle juice in to marinate meats or using for dressings. It was even suggested as a hangover cure, most likely from the high salt content since after a night of drinking you are actually really dehydrated.
As for me, my mother used to pour pickle juice over her rose bushes.
Anyone have any other suggestions?
Move
Well, we moved. We are in the country now, back down south. Because of the unemployment situation we have no job. Our new place is a crappy two bedroom trailer in a park. I can at least say I am back south where the air is warmer and it is ok to play in the rain. We are looking at buying a real home here in the country. A real home for the first time in my life. I want to open a home daycare and give my girls some friends to play with. If you want to help us out just hit the donate button. All money will go to buy us a real home for the first time in my life. Thank you.
Sunday, March 9, 2008
Loyalty or Fear of Change
When does “loyalty” cross the line to “fear of change”?
I consider myself a very loyal person. I am loyal to all kinds of things, big and small. From my friends and family all the way down to my radio station. But, when does being loyal to a certain thing or person cross over into being more of a fear of change. Here is a scenario for you, I get breakfast and lunch in the café at work. And I go thru the same lady’s line at the check out every day. Now I could argue that its because I like her, or she is nice. Or if I really wanted to stretch it, she has the same name as my godmother, who I haven’t seen in around 30 years. But, that is really a stretch. Or simply put, it is now habit. Or I am loyal to the line I go down. Now, how about if she isn’t there, what then? Do I pick another line, do I wait, do I turn around and pretend I am doing something else till she returns? Believe me all these things actually do roll around my head in those few seconds after I realize she is not in her line. I do eventually go down another line. But how about the person who is stranger or crazier than me, (hard to believe in such a person, I know) do they make the same choice or would they choose one of the other options. How about the person who will put their food back and leave the café?
I think that any other decision other than walking down someone else’s line would cross that line to “afraid of change”. But that scenario was easy to pick out the line. How about other scenarios? How easy is it to pick out the line? I think that it would actually be quite difficult to pick out the line in say, your relationship. How hard would it be to see the line between being loyal to your significant other and just being afraid of change. All of us, or maybe just an unlucky few, have been in that relationship where we weighed the pros and cons of leaving our significant other. And considered the inevitable changes that would happen would a breakup occur. And sometimes we choose to stay and others we choose to leave. How many of those times we choose to stay was it more out of a fear of change or was it really loyalty to our love? As I explore myself more and more in an attempt to purge myself of those few lingering hatreds and hurts and general misinformation I have told myself about me for many many years, I have asked myself this question more than once. Am I being loyal or have I crossed that line, and am more afraid of change?
I consider myself a very loyal person. I am loyal to all kinds of things, big and small. From my friends and family all the way down to my radio station. But, when does being loyal to a certain thing or person cross over into being more of a fear of change. Here is a scenario for you, I get breakfast and lunch in the café at work. And I go thru the same lady’s line at the check out every day. Now I could argue that its because I like her, or she is nice. Or if I really wanted to stretch it, she has the same name as my godmother, who I haven’t seen in around 30 years. But, that is really a stretch. Or simply put, it is now habit. Or I am loyal to the line I go down. Now, how about if she isn’t there, what then? Do I pick another line, do I wait, do I turn around and pretend I am doing something else till she returns? Believe me all these things actually do roll around my head in those few seconds after I realize she is not in her line. I do eventually go down another line. But how about the person who is stranger or crazier than me, (hard to believe in such a person, I know) do they make the same choice or would they choose one of the other options. How about the person who will put their food back and leave the café?
I think that any other decision other than walking down someone else’s line would cross that line to “afraid of change”. But that scenario was easy to pick out the line. How about other scenarios? How easy is it to pick out the line? I think that it would actually be quite difficult to pick out the line in say, your relationship. How hard would it be to see the line between being loyal to your significant other and just being afraid of change. All of us, or maybe just an unlucky few, have been in that relationship where we weighed the pros and cons of leaving our significant other. And considered the inevitable changes that would happen would a breakup occur. And sometimes we choose to stay and others we choose to leave. How many of those times we choose to stay was it more out of a fear of change or was it really loyalty to our love? As I explore myself more and more in an attempt to purge myself of those few lingering hatreds and hurts and general misinformation I have told myself about me for many many years, I have asked myself this question more than once. Am I being loyal or have I crossed that line, and am more afraid of change?
Thursday, August 30, 2007
For Dad,
You have got to see this from my point of view. Here you are 21years old, sitting in your old room at your mom's house, because you have nowhere else to go. Pregnant, looking back at the last 6 months, realizing that leaving your husband and your child was the biggest mistake you could have made. Knowing that you can't go back because there is some other woman in your place. Some other woman loving your husband. Some other woman being called 'Mommy' by your son. The father of your unborn baby, married man, disappeared with his whole family when you told him you were pregnant. Your sister hates you because she is also pregnant at the same time with her first child and doesnt want any of mom's attention to be taking from her. Then your mother finds out you are pregnant because your big mouth sister told on you. And she comes into your room and yanks you down by the hair and tells you you will get an abortion. Not asks, tells. And when you stand up to her for the first time in your whole life and tell her no, it puts a rift between you.
Then you write a letter to your dad, because you figure he should know you are going to have another of his grandchildren. And you say don't write back or call until you can except it because you had all the yelling you can take from your mom. And you don't hear from him. So this, little baby, growing in your belly is the only thing you have in the whole world. You know this baby can make you better. Bring you out of this rut you are in. She is your salvation, your angel. So, you keep her. And you love her more than you have every loved anything in your whole life. And she is everything you dreamed. She is your angel, your bright spot in the darkness. The only thing you have to live for, to fight for.
You go out to a strange city to help a grieveing friend, who's mother passed away. And, after about 5 months there, the emotional rollercoaster your friends put you through drives you to a break. You turn to the only person you can think of that may help you. You have a job, you just need a safe place to put your angel. Cause just any place isnt good enough for your angel. You call your dad's and get his wife. You tell her what happened and ask if she can care for your angel. She says yes right away, makes all kinds of promises about "keeping the mother, daughter bond", and drives out right away. And they do keep their promises. For a short while.
Once the legal guardianship papers were signed, one by one the promises got broken. Oh! you got excuses, really lame ones. Cant afford the gas every week, cant afford the collect phone calls. All designed to put distance between me and my angel. Although you dont want to believe it. Finally when able to make the trip to her. As you look around the house she now lives in, you cant hold her, of course, because she is busy eating. you see your dad, whom you trusted more than any other person in the world, sitting you down and saying they are getting attached. And you see your dad with the fancy $2000 a week job. Pretty wife that stays at home. Nice church going christians. Nice fancy house. Smart, soft-spoken lawyer. And you look at yourself. Your bedroom is a pantry. Labor pool job. $400 car. And you know you are screwed. They want to keep your child, your angel and there is nothing you can do about it.
You would have to hire an expensive lawyer and fight to get your child back. Meanwhile she is growing and you cant see her. The pain of leaving is way too much. You can not comprehend the pain of walking away from a child you love with all your heart and watching her concept of mom change from you to someone else. It is 13 years later and that thought still rips my heart.
you came back to the city then, because your son needed you. And he got better. But this isnt about him, it is about my dad and my angel. So I will not say more on that subject.
Almost 2 years have gone by now, and she has forgotten you even existed. And the worst tragedy of your entire life came. August 15th 1996. That day ripped your world and several others to pieces. Nothing was the same after that. But again, that is not for this story.
Short verizon, my son with his step siter and half sister was taking by the state and my husband was jailed. He got out of course, but not for a week. I didnt find out for 5 days that this had happened. By then there was nothing I could do but wait for the court date.
Two weeks or so later, On Oct 2, 1996, my husbands girlfriend died. She was very sick. Died of kidney failure as a result of Hepatitis A. But that again, is another story. That is my son's story. By this time, the state had awarded temporary custody of your son to your dad. And your dad is the one who told him she had died. Your dad, tried alot of tactics to break us. He told fantastic stories about an angry boy he claimed was your son. I am not so sure. First we were allowed to come to his house to visit. Then we werent. Then he started to exaggerate things he saw at the place we used for our visits. Who can turn an innocent stuffed animal throwing fight into something sinister and violent? My dad in a court of law using the case worker as a mouthpiece. Who hasnt played a stuff animal fight or a pillow fight?
I got a crappy lawyer that was working "pro bono" which means he already doesnt care if I win. Then, your dad, gives your son back to the state saying that he is too violent on his sister. But you know his real reason. Your son knows the truth. He knows who her real parents are and he is old enough to tell her the truth.
Christmas comes, and you beg your sister who is going over to your dad's to take the camera and get pictures of your angel. You bring presents for her. Presents from "mommy and daddy" But your evil stepmother says to your angel your name instead of mommy. Because who is mommy now. She is. And the thought that your angel is calling your dad, daddy is just wrong in so many ways. What was wrong with being a grandfather to her? Why did you have to lie? Just so your wife can have a child?
Then, here is the dosy, your own father sues you for childsupport!! The same man who wont give her back, the same man that makes $2000 a week, needs childsupport from someone making minimum wage? That is soo transparent. He is looking to increase the financial burden so you will give up rights to your angel. But that isnt going to happen. You agreed to garnished wages. So from that point it was your works job to take out the money. Which actually they didnt do. So what does your loving dad do now? He takes you back to court!!
When the judge realizes that the man sueing you is your father, he asks your dad what he wants to happen. Your dad says, "I don't know what to do with her anymore". The judge says "Well, sir, I am going to reprimand her to the county jail" and your father says, if you can believe this "Do what you have to do" So, what did the judge do? "Ma'am, I am reprimanding you to the county jail" And just like that they came over with handcuffs, ready to cuff you and take you to jail. Your husband and new born daughter outside waiting for you. You plead with the judge. "Please dont put me in jail. I am the sole support for my family. I am 5months pregnant. I get paid tomorrow and rent is tomorrow. If I don't pay it they will get kicked out." The judge has a kinder heart than your own dad. He lets you off with a stiff fine that needs to be paid within a week.
After that, your paranoia escalates to its highest degree. One night while walking home, a cop car drives by, and your mind tells you that they are out looking for you. Your dad has found some way to throw you in jail and they are coming for you. You are so scared you can't talk. Your only thought is "Get home". Walking in the door, your husband is there, seeing you. Does just what he knows will calm you. And your brother, who was watching, will swear to this day, if not for your husband, you would have lost your mind.
But your dad has one more tactic to pull before he finally won the prize. He sued me to terminate my parental rights to my angel. You knew then you could not win. That was not a fight you could win. You had no lawyer, no money. And your other kid is in the states custody right now. And they are finding reason after reason not to return the child. You are good enough to keep your baby girl you had after the state took your son and your dad took your angel. But you are not good enough to have your son returned. Figure that one out.
So, your dad with his $2000 a week job, and smart fancy lawyer was going to mudsling you until you lost. And you had nothing to fight with. You couldnt even go to the court room. Couldnt even look at the man who for the last 5 years had put you thru hell on earth. For what? So his wife could be called Mommy?
He would tell you that he was protecting her, saving her from me. That the harm you did her in the first 5months of her life was so determental, that he had to take these steps. What harm. A little undernorished. Missed a couple of shots. She was fed, clothed and loved.
So, to save any chance you had of winning my son, you conceided defeat. And lost your angel. You made the ultimate sacrifice. You sacrificed one child to save the other. How can your own father make you make that kind of choice. The man who gave you life. The man who held you when you were small. The man who you loved more than any other person on the entire planet.
Shortly after that, my dad disappeared. Refused to come to my sister's wedding. And has absolutly no contact with any of us. And I have not seen, or heard from my father or my angel in 10 years.
There is not a day that goes by that I dont think of them. Not once can I think of them without feeling the raw, open wounds that still exist on my heart and my soul. Wounds that can not heal. Not for another 5 years. Not till she is 18, and I am allowed to hold my angel again.
Then you write a letter to your dad, because you figure he should know you are going to have another of his grandchildren. And you say don't write back or call until you can except it because you had all the yelling you can take from your mom. And you don't hear from him. So this, little baby, growing in your belly is the only thing you have in the whole world. You know this baby can make you better. Bring you out of this rut you are in. She is your salvation, your angel. So, you keep her. And you love her more than you have every loved anything in your whole life. And she is everything you dreamed. She is your angel, your bright spot in the darkness. The only thing you have to live for, to fight for.
You go out to a strange city to help a grieveing friend, who's mother passed away. And, after about 5 months there, the emotional rollercoaster your friends put you through drives you to a break. You turn to the only person you can think of that may help you. You have a job, you just need a safe place to put your angel. Cause just any place isnt good enough for your angel. You call your dad's and get his wife. You tell her what happened and ask if she can care for your angel. She says yes right away, makes all kinds of promises about "keeping the mother, daughter bond", and drives out right away. And they do keep their promises. For a short while.
Once the legal guardianship papers were signed, one by one the promises got broken. Oh! you got excuses, really lame ones. Cant afford the gas every week, cant afford the collect phone calls. All designed to put distance between me and my angel. Although you dont want to believe it. Finally when able to make the trip to her. As you look around the house she now lives in, you cant hold her, of course, because she is busy eating. you see your dad, whom you trusted more than any other person in the world, sitting you down and saying they are getting attached. And you see your dad with the fancy $2000 a week job. Pretty wife that stays at home. Nice church going christians. Nice fancy house. Smart, soft-spoken lawyer. And you look at yourself. Your bedroom is a pantry. Labor pool job. $400 car. And you know you are screwed. They want to keep your child, your angel and there is nothing you can do about it.
You would have to hire an expensive lawyer and fight to get your child back. Meanwhile she is growing and you cant see her. The pain of leaving is way too much. You can not comprehend the pain of walking away from a child you love with all your heart and watching her concept of mom change from you to someone else. It is 13 years later and that thought still rips my heart.
you came back to the city then, because your son needed you. And he got better. But this isnt about him, it is about my dad and my angel. So I will not say more on that subject.
Almost 2 years have gone by now, and she has forgotten you even existed. And the worst tragedy of your entire life came. August 15th 1996. That day ripped your world and several others to pieces. Nothing was the same after that. But again, that is not for this story.
Short verizon, my son with his step siter and half sister was taking by the state and my husband was jailed. He got out of course, but not for a week. I didnt find out for 5 days that this had happened. By then there was nothing I could do but wait for the court date.
Two weeks or so later, On Oct 2, 1996, my husbands girlfriend died. She was very sick. Died of kidney failure as a result of Hepatitis A. But that again, is another story. That is my son's story. By this time, the state had awarded temporary custody of your son to your dad. And your dad is the one who told him she had died. Your dad, tried alot of tactics to break us. He told fantastic stories about an angry boy he claimed was your son. I am not so sure. First we were allowed to come to his house to visit. Then we werent. Then he started to exaggerate things he saw at the place we used for our visits. Who can turn an innocent stuffed animal throwing fight into something sinister and violent? My dad in a court of law using the case worker as a mouthpiece. Who hasnt played a stuff animal fight or a pillow fight?
I got a crappy lawyer that was working "pro bono" which means he already doesnt care if I win. Then, your dad, gives your son back to the state saying that he is too violent on his sister. But you know his real reason. Your son knows the truth. He knows who her real parents are and he is old enough to tell her the truth.
Christmas comes, and you beg your sister who is going over to your dad's to take the camera and get pictures of your angel. You bring presents for her. Presents from "mommy and daddy" But your evil stepmother says to your angel your name instead of mommy. Because who is mommy now. She is. And the thought that your angel is calling your dad, daddy is just wrong in so many ways. What was wrong with being a grandfather to her? Why did you have to lie? Just so your wife can have a child?
Then, here is the dosy, your own father sues you for childsupport!! The same man who wont give her back, the same man that makes $2000 a week, needs childsupport from someone making minimum wage? That is soo transparent. He is looking to increase the financial burden so you will give up rights to your angel. But that isnt going to happen. You agreed to garnished wages. So from that point it was your works job to take out the money. Which actually they didnt do. So what does your loving dad do now? He takes you back to court!!
When the judge realizes that the man sueing you is your father, he asks your dad what he wants to happen. Your dad says, "I don't know what to do with her anymore". The judge says "Well, sir, I am going to reprimand her to the county jail" and your father says, if you can believe this "Do what you have to do" So, what did the judge do? "Ma'am, I am reprimanding you to the county jail" And just like that they came over with handcuffs, ready to cuff you and take you to jail. Your husband and new born daughter outside waiting for you. You plead with the judge. "Please dont put me in jail. I am the sole support for my family. I am 5months pregnant. I get paid tomorrow and rent is tomorrow. If I don't pay it they will get kicked out." The judge has a kinder heart than your own dad. He lets you off with a stiff fine that needs to be paid within a week.
After that, your paranoia escalates to its highest degree. One night while walking home, a cop car drives by, and your mind tells you that they are out looking for you. Your dad has found some way to throw you in jail and they are coming for you. You are so scared you can't talk. Your only thought is "Get home". Walking in the door, your husband is there, seeing you. Does just what he knows will calm you. And your brother, who was watching, will swear to this day, if not for your husband, you would have lost your mind.
But your dad has one more tactic to pull before he finally won the prize. He sued me to terminate my parental rights to my angel. You knew then you could not win. That was not a fight you could win. You had no lawyer, no money. And your other kid is in the states custody right now. And they are finding reason after reason not to return the child. You are good enough to keep your baby girl you had after the state took your son and your dad took your angel. But you are not good enough to have your son returned. Figure that one out.
So, your dad with his $2000 a week job, and smart fancy lawyer was going to mudsling you until you lost. And you had nothing to fight with. You couldnt even go to the court room. Couldnt even look at the man who for the last 5 years had put you thru hell on earth. For what? So his wife could be called Mommy?
He would tell you that he was protecting her, saving her from me. That the harm you did her in the first 5months of her life was so determental, that he had to take these steps. What harm. A little undernorished. Missed a couple of shots. She was fed, clothed and loved.
So, to save any chance you had of winning my son, you conceided defeat. And lost your angel. You made the ultimate sacrifice. You sacrificed one child to save the other. How can your own father make you make that kind of choice. The man who gave you life. The man who held you when you were small. The man who you loved more than any other person on the entire planet.
Shortly after that, my dad disappeared. Refused to come to my sister's wedding. And has absolutly no contact with any of us. And I have not seen, or heard from my father or my angel in 10 years.
There is not a day that goes by that I dont think of them. Not once can I think of them without feeling the raw, open wounds that still exist on my heart and my soul. Wounds that can not heal. Not for another 5 years. Not till she is 18, and I am allowed to hold my angel again.
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