When does “loyalty” cross the line to “fear of change”?
I consider myself a very loyal person. I am loyal to all kinds of things, big and small. From my friends and family all the way down to my radio station. But, when does being loyal to a certain thing or person cross over into being more of a fear of change. Here is a scenario for you, I get breakfast and lunch in the café at work. And I go thru the same lady’s line at the check out every day. Now I could argue that its because I like her, or she is nice. Or if I really wanted to stretch it, she has the same name as my godmother, who I haven’t seen in around 30 years. But, that is really a stretch. Or simply put, it is now habit. Or I am loyal to the line I go down. Now, how about if she isn’t there, what then? Do I pick another line, do I wait, do I turn around and pretend I am doing something else till she returns? Believe me all these things actually do roll around my head in those few seconds after I realize she is not in her line. I do eventually go down another line. But how about the person who is stranger or crazier than me, (hard to believe in such a person, I know) do they make the same choice or would they choose one of the other options. How about the person who will put their food back and leave the café?
I think that any other decision other than walking down someone else’s line would cross that line to “afraid of change”. But that scenario was easy to pick out the line. How about other scenarios? How easy is it to pick out the line? I think that it would actually be quite difficult to pick out the line in say, your relationship. How hard would it be to see the line between being loyal to your significant other and just being afraid of change. All of us, or maybe just an unlucky few, have been in that relationship where we weighed the pros and cons of leaving our significant other. And considered the inevitable changes that would happen would a breakup occur. And sometimes we choose to stay and others we choose to leave. How many of those times we choose to stay was it more out of a fear of change or was it really loyalty to our love? As I explore myself more and more in an attempt to purge myself of those few lingering hatreds and hurts and general misinformation I have told myself about me for many many years, I have asked myself this question more than once. Am I being loyal or have I crossed that line, and am more afraid of change?
